If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide, please remember that suicidal thinking is the result of being in an extreme shame attack. The suffering person is grappling with life-issues or events that provide a context of seeing oneself as unlovable and worthless. Continue reading
Tag Archives: family
Relationships and Attachment
Some people make attachments with others that go from one extreme to the other: “I don’t want you; please don’t leave me!” They overshoot that midpoint of secure attachment and don’t get much joy or comfort from their connections with others. Continue reading
Divorce and Children: Protecting the Innocent
Divorce can become a very self-centered time for parents. I do not mean this judgmentally. There, but for the grace of God, go I. During my divorce, which took place over 25 years ago, I became so anxious for my own future, I didn’t take the time to empathize with my children’s experience and I believed they suffered as a result. Continue reading
Stress andTrauma: Second-Hand Shock
We think Second-Hand Shock Syndrome needs to be identified and treated as its own illness. Lots of folks are treated for illnesses such as arthritis, cancer, heart, disease, obesity, anxiety and depression, who we believe began their downhill descent with some form of Second- Hand Shock Syndrome. Continue reading
Blended Families: “Growing Up” Together
Statistics demonstrate that more Americans are living in step-families than in nuclear families. Blended families are clearly a key ingredient of our culture; so how can we make them more successful in the long haul? Continue reading
Anger Management: Pity and the Pedestal
Some people substitute pity and the pedestal for their own legitimate experience of anger at someone’s bad behavior. Continue reading
My Mother’s Father: A Deliberate and Gentle Life
This Father’s day, my mind does not go to my late father who literally ran himself into an early grave by overdoing anything and everything he did. God rest his soul; he lived addictively and it cost him his life. Life with my father may have to wait for another blog because he is actually … Continue reading
Cheating in Relationships: I Thought I Saw a Mouse!
Remember that cheating is a symptom of some unaddressed issue in your relationship that deserves immediate attention. Carrying on about the affair distracts you from identifying this crucial relationship concern. Whether you stay in the relationship or not, you need this information in order to grow as you move forward. Continue reading
Road to Resilience Can Be Rocky
Attending and graduating from the “School of Hard Knocks” plays a key role in how a person learns to be resilient. Studies show that kids who grew up in adverse living conditions seem to demonstrate a richer depth of resilience in adulthood. Continue reading
Divorce, Domestic Abuse and Brainwashing
Women or men who stay entangled with aggressor partners do so because they have become brainwashed by the aggressor over time. The method of brainwashing in a verbally abusive domestic relationship is no different than the method of brainwashing used with POW’s. Continue reading
Doc Ellie🙏🏼 